Re: Part 2 of 2 -- Re: GDP: NR 1.1 Pitches 2008-01-26

[Kurt Kroon]

On 2/2/08 5:26 PM, "Kurt Kroon" <address@hidden> wrote:

> On 1/26/08 9:28 PM, "Graham Percival" <address@hidden> wrote:
> 
>> Final call for comments on NR 1.1 Pitches.  Please note that this
>> is our "demonstration" chapter, which will form the guidelines for
>> the rest of the NR.  So if there's anything that you don't like
>> about the general layout and policies of this section, please
>> speak up now, before the entire NR is changed to match.
>> 
>> Read it online, download the pdf, print it out and read on a bus with a
>> red pen in hand... please review it any way that suits you.  :)  I'll
>> wait a week before declaring this section "perfect".
> 

More observations -- where appropriate, I've indicated my changes in [square
brackets]:

Generally -- "which" and "that" have specific uses that we aren't observing
very well. "That" introduces a restrictive subclause and should not be
preceded by a comma. Removing this clause changes the meaning of the
sentence, usually by making it more general.  On the other hand, "which"
introduces an informative (but non-restrictive) subclause and should be
preceded by a comma.  I replaced which with that below (and in my preceding
email) where the following clause was restrictive and couldn't be removed
without generalizing the meaning of the sentence.

And here's the continued list of my specific observations ---

Page 9, antepenultimate paragraph (missed this in my first go-round) -- "For
example, when entering music that [not which] begins on a notated E (concert
D) [moved this section up] for a B-flat trumpet, one could write ..."

Page 12 -- the list of predefined clefs is not very systematic. I suggest
putting them in this order, which is based on putting middle C on the next
higher line:

Clef name       Position of middle C
french          2 ledger lines below the staff
treble          1 ledger line below the staff
soprano         bottom staff line
mezzosoprano    second staff line
alto            third staff line
tenor           fourth staff line
baritone        fifth staff line (C clef)
varbaritone     fifth staff line (F clef)
bass            1 ledger line above the staff
subbass         2 ledger lines above the staff
percussion      N/A
tab             N/A

The preceding example could be rewritten to show this visually:

\clef french
c2 c
\clef treble
c2 c
\clef soprano
c2 c
\clef mezzosoprano
c2 c
\clef alto
c2 c
\clef tenor
c2 c
\clef baritone
c2 c
\clef varbaritone
c2 c
\clef bass
c2 c
\clef subbass
c2 c

Same page, first sentence of the second paragraph in "Selected snippets" --
delete the comma after octavation: "or the octavation does not in ..."

Ditto, third sentence -- change litotes to a positive statement (unless the
litotes is incorrect and the sentence should be negative): "The
clefOctavation value would normally be set to 7, -7, 15 or -15, but other
values are valid."

Page 13 -- "end of the previous line is [not in] not required ..."

Page 14 -- Unlike the clefs, the order of the modes is systematic, but based
on a descending scale.  If you accept my suggestion of clefs above, please
consider ordering the modes in ascending sequence as well, namely: Ionian,
Dorian, Phrygian, Lydian, Mixolydian, Aeolian, Locrian.

Page 16 -- last line "so an instrument that [not which] produces a real
sound ..."

Page 18, under "Automatic accidentals" -- "LilyPond provides a function to
specify which [delete such because it's awkward] accidental style ...."

Same page, same section, next paragraph -- "Optionally, the function can
take a second argument that [not which] determines in which ..."

Page 20, second section of "modern" section -- "It prints the same
accidentals as default, with two exceptions that [not which] serve to ..."

Page 22, "Selected snippets" -- "... every pitch in the twelve-tone [removed
extra space, changed note to tone] scale ..."

Page 23, "Ambitus", second sentence in second paragraph -- "... two note
heads that represent the lowest and highest [less awkward than minimum and
maximum] pitches."

Okey dokey, that's enough for now.

Kurt