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[DotGNU]Re: second draft for FD press release about DotGNU


From: Jon Babcock
Subject: [DotGNU]Re: second draft for FD press release about DotGNU
Date: Tue, 10 Jul 2001 21:07:14 -0600
User-agent: Mozilla/5.0 (X11; U; Linux i686; en-US; rv:0.9.2+) Gecko/20010707

My kneejerk reaction on first reading is as follows:


Norbert Bollow wrote:

PRELIMINARY VERSION - NOT AUTHORIZED FOR RELEASE
(The above line will eventually be changed to "FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE")


FREE SOFTWARE DEVELOPERS FROM AROUND THE WORLD MOBILIZE TO PREVENT EXTENSION OF MICROSOFT'S MONOPOLY TO THE INTERNET.
DOTGNU TO FACE DOWN .NET




DOTGNU TO FACE DOWN .NET

 Should be the opening line.

DOTGNU is weaker than .NET. Why not .GNU which is equally as strong?


Washington DC, USA - July 11, 2001 - FreeDevelopers announced today
the DotGNU project, a Free Software alternative to Microsoft's .NET
initiative, which has been adopted into the GNU project by the Free
Software Foundation.


Two sentences may be clearer, e.g,:

FreeDevelopers announced today the DotGNU project, a Free Software alternative to Microsoft's .NET. DotGNU will be part of the Free Software Foundation's GNU project.

"... will be part of ..." could also be " is part of " or " will be/is/has been adopted by", "has the full support of", etc.

Must stop here now. More later.


Jon


--
Jon Babcock <address@hidden>





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